Forget Brexit, Trump or the deaths of countless numbers of your favourite celebrities, the real low point of 2016 was the refusal to name a new £200 Million Royal Research Ship ‘Boaty McBoatface’.
As is the way with such things another country has taken the initiative and shown the steely strength, passionate purpose and resolute resolve needed that Britain simply lacked.
Well done Australia, well done.
Even in its concept art stage, Ferry McFerryface oozes the class, humour and downright fabulousness that sent the UK Government running into the comfortable and safe arms of mediocrity.
Just look at it…
FERRY MCFERRYFACEThe entire world, soon
Unbeknownst to some Australians however, some had the audacity to question the move, unaware they live in a country where true democracy reigns and Boris Johnson’s brother doesn’t get a say on things.
Rejoice Australia for the UK will not be laughing at you – we’ll be laughing with you.
We may have sneered at Sweden’s bandwagoning ‘Trainy McTrainface’ but this is simply something we couldn’t do ourselves.
Alas, that joy will soon turn to tears for us as we think of what could have been.
Sure, RRS David Attenborough is a decent name in honour of one of the greatest human beings ever to grace the planet, but…
And it’s here we offload our terribly British guilt – things could have been even more glorious.
‘Boaty McBoatface’ actually received the most votes in the public poll to name the ferry but Minister for Transport and Infrastructure Andrew Constance said it was avoided in order to prevent a duplicate of the pathetically tiny glorified marrow that was named ‘Boaty McBoatface’ in a cynical attempt to pacify the UK public last year.
Revolutions have been started over less.